Long time no see. Last week was Thanksgiving in the US, and we all know what that means. Lots of dead turkeys being eaten, and lots of sleeping. For some, it also means shopping. But not for me. Oh, no. I sleep. Of course I did little online shopping, but I am by no means a “shopper” like shoppers used to be.
I loathe going outside. Actually no. I loathe the possibility of interacting with other humans. I don’t mind going to work, and I don’t mind my family or friends. My issue comes when I walk into a store and have to potentially deal with idiots. People walking into, or in front of you while you’re looking at something. I don’t mind the cashiers, I don’t mind the employees, what I mind is the general populace. See, it all started in high school when I had a part time job at a retail store. The job was fine, it paid a minimum wage, no issues with that. The problem came when dealing with customers. Smart people know what they want, they get it and leave. Most people are not smart. Most people, are unaware of their surroundings, and most people are generally assholes.
“What?! That can’t be me!!!” You exclaim to yourself. Yes, especially you who just exclaimed that. Smart people don’t go outside to shop, they stay indoors and shop from home, where a person will literally deliver it to your door. Why go out, when the product can come to you??!?! IT LITERALLY GETS DROPPED OFF AT YOUR DOORSTEP!!!
But, never mind all that. Because at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what I think of you, or what you think of me, or what either of us think of shopping. What is important, is accountability.
Are you being the best person you can possibly be? Are you caring enough to those you claim you love? Do you spend time with the people you supposedly care about? Do you ask them how their lives are? What their going through? If they have anything on their minds? Do you make yourself available to listen to them?
You don’t have to answer those questions to me. But I think about these questions a lot, and I personally feel like I am lacking in some of them, or that I feel those close to me might be feeling unloved. Could I be over analyzing? Yes. I absolutely over analyze the shit out of everything.
But, I could also be possibly correct in feeling that things are off.
And then I wonder… is it okay that things are just off right now? Should I try and figure it all out or do I let it run its course?
Who even knows what the best way to do something is?
Life is a little too hard sometimes. And it really doesn’t need to be. It feels heavy, and bothersome, and smothers you. And sometimes I can’t even tell if it’s my depression talking or if it actually is that way.
It also doesn’t help that it’s been raining for two days straight. In November. In New York. This is not the time for rain Mrs. Weather. Take that shit back to Spring.
On the bright side, I am working on a crochet project. It currently looks like this:
Yes, it looks like absolutely nothing. At the moment, that is. It should eventually start looking like a baby blanket. The operative word here is “should.” We’ll have to see how that goes.
Keep you posted!
The Quirky Digest